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I realise writing this might make me sound like a proper, grumpy old man, and I promise you, I’m not. Well, actually that depends on what kind of day you catch me on and if my mini-me decided to stay in bed past 5am…

But Valentine’s Day. Seriously? Are we honestly meant to believe that the sea of red, the cards, the chocolates, the champagne on a SPECIFIC day of the year is what romance is all about? I just don’t buy into it. I’m pretty confident we all tell our significant others how much they mean to us and how much we love them on a regular basis (if you don’t then you should). I’m the working parent but I know how bloody tough it is being at home with a four-year-old for most of the day. It’s tiring, testing and sometimes can drive you absolutely insane. So I make sure my partner gets the love and attention (and days off from the four-year-old!) as often as he needs.

Yes it’s commercialised, and I suppose you could say Christmas is too, and Easter. Because they are. But there’s something oh so cringey about:

1. Dining out in a restaurant crammed to fit as many people as possible (not romantic in the slightest)

2. The expectation to gift something amazing when we’ve all just had Christmas a minute ago

3. And not to mention the pressure to have sex… sorry if TMI, but i prefer a bit of spontaneity.

I’m a fan of most holidays but for me anniversaries mean so much more. Your first date, your wedding anniversary, those are the nights you can head out and have a quiet meal without the premium slapped on just because ‘it’s Valentine’s’. And it means so much more.

I couldn’t even tell you what the meaning behind Valentine’s is? But what I do know is how hard it can be to keep that spark there. To keep going. To keep laughing. So Valentine’s Day definitely does serve its purpose if you find it difficult to find two minutes to even talk to one another or find that time to make effort. If that is you, then I say go for it. Use this day as a real excuse to get a babysitter, dress up and go out! Or get them to bed nice and early and have a lovely dinner at home (and PUT THE PHONES AWAY).

As for me, pass me a glass of fizz and an M&S dinner for two and I am set!

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Hi I'm Tom. I'm a dad. An adoptive dad. A gay dad. Not your 'normal' dad perhaps? My husband and I are two years into life life with our 3.5 yr old. The days of city breaks and long weekends eating out are long gone, but replaced with the great outdoors and running around after our little boy and splashing in muddy puddles. I wouldn't change it for the world. You can follow my blog at or find me on Facebook @unlikelydad

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